The USA
Humans.
The United States of America
Agriculture
Let’s go with the atomic bomb…if you disagree, consider that we made a weapon too powerful to ever be used again, but nations that have them get taken way more seriously in diplomacy.
And let’s be serious, it’s pretty much tick-tock, tick-tock before they get used again when they get put in the hands of zealots. Let’s be doubly serious, it will be religion that convinces some leader that they are within their divine rights to cleanse the world of their enemies.
Human history, as a whole, is so depressing and meandering it’s a weird question to try and answer. Were the great empires a success, or a failure? It depends on if you’re measuring monuments built or social justice enacted, and if you’re comparing against modern polities or whatever shitty local warlord they replaced. History doesn’t really have an end goal, as much as we’d like it to.
Maybe you just meant a personal failure:
Thomas Midgley is one of my favourites, because he’s famous for three things: Inventing leaded gasoline, inventing ozone-destroying PCBs, and inventing the accessibility contraption that strangled Thomas Midgley. He did nothing else of note; he’s like the real Bloody Stupid Johnson.
Marathon is famous for running a long way just to deliver some news first, and then dying from exhaustion. People regularly make the same trip and are fine. He was regarded as a hero, and the races were originally in his honour, but I wouldn’t want to be him.
Muhammad II of Khwarazm received an envoy from Ghengis Khan, who wasn’t bent on invading at all but wanted trade, and decided to take their shit instead. Then he killed the people sent next to ask for a nice apology. You can guess where that went.
The Soviets once tried to sextort Indonesian quasi-communist leader Sukarno with a sex tape. It did not work, because he was shamelessly proud of his “virility”. In at least some tellings he misinterprets the KGB’s presentation as a gift, although I doubt he could have been that dumb.
If it’s the same person I’m thinking about he understood that it was blackmail but didn’t care. He requested copies of the tape to keep for himself.
“Thanks bro/comrade!” would be a great way to play this off diplomatically with someone you still want to be allies with, so that could be the origin of that bit.
Isn’t what we call a marathon just the last short leg of his journey, and he ran like 100-150 miles?
In addition to mixing up the man and the place, I got that wrong. Fixed.
Humans.
“Let’s just divide up Poland and keep the peace. We can focus our whole energy on the western front, you can save yourselves bloodshed by the tanker load, and in a few short years we can share dominion over a subjugated world.”
“You so right, that sounds like a great plan”
“Hey guess what I just decided”
The whole world would have been different. It was still a pretty close thing with help from the Soviets and with Germany fighting a ludicrous two-front war for literally no military or geopolitical reason at all.
How do I politely suggest that learning history through HOI4 or WWII subreddits might not be the best idea?
What about that didn’t happen? Enlighten me.
Every time someone tried to make “a weapon so powerful it would make people not want to wage war”.
Several weapons are on this list, from the cannon to the machine gun to, most famously, the atomic bomb.
The fact that this happened once would’ve been understandable. The fact this escalated to nuclear weapons because people just tried pushing this idea is nuts though.
This is not toward so much the technology, with all tech being no less inevitable, but more to do with the intentions/hindsight/foresight of the people making something that can only be produced by an assembly in a seemingly dire setting, as opposed to something like AI, which does not stem from that and which would’ve come around at some time.
By extension, this extends to populism in general, a mindset that from experience I refuse to compliment. I’m surrounded by people every day who come off as thinking with their feet and not with the methodological part of them, and my experiences with this have never allowed me to be fully at peace.
Surprised the chat isn’t calling me out.
I say we fucked up the moment we existed.
Ur mom giving birth to you
spoiler
Kidding, of course. I felt like someone had to make the dumb low-hanging fruit joke.
Communism
Found it!
The Citroen 2CV.
There are many cars that have something worse; three wheeled things, Tesla design, the Renault dash mounted gearstick, etc.
But there is no other “modern” car which so significantly fails in every way as the 2CV.
It has nothing that could be described as performance or ride or comfort. There is nothing about it that can be called practical or stylish. It has zero properties that any sane person could find desirable in a car.
It’s so bad that even the Trabant has less to damn it, and that really is terrible.
I think the best evidence that the 2CV is man’s biggest failure, should you really need any, is that you are more likely to see them in the country they were made, repurposed as a chicken coop.
If that’s not the ultimate failure, I don’t know what is.
If you needed a light car with simple mechanics, it was kinda fitted though
There were so many better options that I can’t even grant you a nod in this direction.
Nil points, yellow card, etc.
I think the Austin Allegro would like to challenge you for a car with absolutely zero redeeming qualities.
If memory serves, I think at least some versions of the Allegro had reasonably comfy seats. I’m afraid that can’t be said of the 2CV.
Also, the use of a “double skin” body, dropped by almost every manufacturer a decade or so before the Allegro, is really just another amusing tidbit we can taunt it with.
There absolutely nothing even faintly comic about the 2CV, it is an abhorrence at every level.
But I’ll grant you, the Allegro is definitely in the top 10.
0-40 km/h (25 mi/h) in 42 seconds…. That’s 42, not 4.2 in case someone thought I missed the decimal. How did this sell almost 92k units per year up through the 80s?
No 0-60, you would die trying. Even 40 mi/h is over ambitious. Clearly, the 2CV was spawned by Satan to destroy our will to live. I see no other reason for that many sales.
Removed by mod
