I didn’t think he would really do it.
Obviously he was hoping to take his powers.
Couldn’t hear the safe word through the ball gag.
If you’re in the vatican, what else is there to do?
He had his eye on a really nice couch in the lobby.
Imagine a couch. Comfortable. Soft. Now imagine it can move you around wherever you want to go. Imagine it is surrounded by bullet-proof glass to keep you safe, but also so you can enjoy adoration from millions of people without even having to get up.
Well, it exists, but it’s one-of-a-kind, it can only have one owner, and it’s currently spoken-for. What do you do?
Vance killing the Pope in order to get a chance at fucking the Pope-mobile is my new favorite head cannon.
Vance killed him because the Pope didn’t own a suit
Pope didn’t say Thank you.
But he did prove the power of prayer
Pope didn’t wear a suit.
Pope was wearing a dress.
White Pope robes? Don’t you know how to wear respectful clothing?
maybe it lacks some stuff…like a pointy hood thingy
Because Elon wanted it. Vance doesn’t have an ounce of initiative in his body. He doesn’t need a reason other than his boss asked him.
That pure malice that emanates from JankyDick is not recommended for anyone over the age of 80.
because the pope wouldn’t give him his couch
The pope realized that no just or loving god would let that couch fucker anywhere near any position of power, so he offed himself out of depression.
Plausible explanation.
The Pope refused to join his Signal group.
He joined the wrong signal group. Vance only realized when the pope asked “what’s up with all the couch pics?”
To get a right wing replacement, duh.
Eek! Use a spoiler tag, you scared the Bejesus out of me with that thing.
At least they didn’t Photoshop Roger Stone’s face on there.
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The pope asked the Trump administration to be kind to immigrants and the poor. Can’t have talk like that from the church.
Doesn’t the Pope know that empathy is a sin?
The devil is tempting me to be kind and have compassion for others.
Don’t tempt me, bro.
Lol church money flowing to the poor and needy? How would the poor get into heaven without a life of suffering? (Mother Theresa’s view on charity, not mine).
Careful now, Martin Luther!
Talking to sex pest Jimmy Dilbert Vance is so exhausting it takes 10 years off your life, the Pope didn’t have 10 years left.
Ain’t no way his middle name is Dilbert. The Pope probably died laughing when he heard.
