I’ve never realized it could get this bad. I’ve always been miserable my whole life, but i feel like i’ve hit a new low. The combination of middle eastern politics, toxic environment and stressful worklife is such a toxic one…

I took a day off today, because i was so anxious that all i could do is lie on the couch and pray it passes. Didn’t have anyone to help me, since everyone i knew was asleep (i wake up very early) or i didn’t want to annoy them. I felt like i just wanted to jump off the building to stop the pain.

Then i took zoloft a couple of minutes ago. I’m not having a panic attack anymore (hence me creating this post) but i still feel so shitty. I’ve had a horrible day before it even started, and i have a huge backlog of work that i have to finish in two days. Usually i forget to take zoloft, since i felt like it doesn’t have an effect at all on me (maybe i’ll make another post about this later) But i guess it helps a little.

Bah, rant over.