As an asexual, I’ve already talked about how frustrating it is to see how everything’s sexualized, but I wanted to talk about other specific stuff and I’m sure other aces will agree with me.
It’s honestly so annoying that 2 people of either gender can’t be close together without other people thinking that they’re totally married or in a relationship and shit. This happened to me personally already, some absolute sickos paired me and my sister after seeing us for the first time just because we were sitting together. I’ve also had many friends of opposite gender and same thing happened to my brother also, we couldn’t even hug our friends without getting the looks
My mother(who is straight and also finds this annoying) talked to us about this and said that this became even worse during recent years and that especially before people used to be a lot more closer with each other in friendly relationships, kisses and hugs were normal friendly gestures. Also for example, she slept(key word: slept) in the same bed with her friends of both genders during high school on sleepovers and she isn’t bi, same thing with me as an ace.
Eastern Europe is another special case for close relationships and gestures in terms of hugging, kissing etc (cough Fraternal kiss cough) and some older people especially are so used to it and is completely normal for them.
Allos are generally so annoying about this, they’ll watch a movie and see 2 completely random characters and then talk on and on about what would be if these 2 got in a relationship, even if the characters just stood in the same room next to each other or the media is not related to romance at all.
I mean, they sexualized fucking vampires over time, as someone from Balkans, this irks me on so many levels because these things were disgusting non-rotting corpses which spread plague, transformed into shit like bats, insects, rodents etc and drained people. Like no sir, if they were real, they wouldn’t be interested in any kind of relationship with you, they’ll see you as bloodbag and drain you dry if you didn’t already die of plague they brought beforehand.
Same thing goes for many other things which allos sexualized or see in sexual way, be it friendly gestures, closeness with family and friends or just generally normally being together or spending time with someone. Real life isn’t a drama TV show where everyone’s cheating everybody and sleeping around with anyone they know or meet.
Hypersexuality can be destructive for the self and online spaces see high rates of hypersexuality that are seen as sex-positivity instead. This leaks out into the real world eventually.
I think it’s direly important to understand where sexuality ends and the real world begins. lots of functional adults cannot do this and it leads to things like bioessessentialist thinking (women just want to get RAILED by HARD STRONG ALPHA MEN
WHO ARE BLACK) or obsessive shipping (x and y would be so good together! imagine how they would have sex?!). It makes conversations uncomfortable and makes whatever space they are inhabiting inherently adult-only.There is so much to this world other than sex. There’s so much to just human relations other than sex. Really, sex takes up such a small part of our lives but disproportionately motivates much of it for most people. It’s a sad state of affairs and I can definitely see where you’re coming from, OP.
Can I give you the number of one of my coworkers so you can talk to him? Sounds like you could make a difference lmao.
This dude, when asked what he wants in life, just answers: wat nice thing and hopefully have much sex. Like, man what an empty existence. And every other day he just has to talk about how he had sex with his gf or how his dick was really hard that day or whatever. Like, dude, get a fucking grip man.