Probably never masturbate again
All the cables, copper is so passe.
(I have just chacked and copper has lower resistivity. Why people say that gold has the best conductivity?)
Silver is the “gold” standard as far as I am aware. Though I think gold is considered better compared to copper because of oxidation reasons.
Devaluate gold.
Go to all the Republican party conventions and give everyone a warm handshake.
That’s for everyone’s benefit. Me, I would just go grab levels and stack them in a box.
The man with the gilded crotch…
…not touch my…shit I touched it, didn’t I?
Goldmember…
Get distracted and scratch my nose.
Touch all the CEOs I can get my hands on
Turn my microplastic collection I’ve been hoarding in my body into gold.
Lead. Alchemy baby.
I want to say I’d strategically accrue wealth and use it to make the world a better place, but realistically I’d probably just end up running around turning random stuff into gold and totally crashing the gold market.
Masturbation is out so, probably something productive.
Jerk off.
[Insert goldmember]
this certain mike myers movie was in my head when i read the prompt.
where though, i cannot say
Get a pair of chain mail gloves. Put them on and they turn to gold and still function as gloves.
Then wear my gold gloves around at will, using my gold touch to further materials science.
Gold can be weaved, just get a pair of cotton or silk gloves. They’ll be lighter.
Chain mail is already heavy and you want to make it gold?
High five a certain gold loving narcissist
It would be fitting that his hand would be stuck upright in that “awkward hand gesture”
