“I can take 'im. I got my AR-15. Hold my beer…”
“I don’t know about this, Tommy…”
Don’t puss out on me kn…"
Crunch. Snap. Scream.
Polar bears are very curious animals, so if you back away while slowly undressing they will stop to inspect each piece of clothing, giving you time to get away.
They are also one of the few, next to tigers, land predators that actually have a taste for human blood. The nature of a polar bear thinks it can eat it then it will certainly try. You also absolutely cannot out run them.
Fighting bears isn’t that common of an encounter. I’d be more worried about deer and coyotes or even a single cougar than the off chance of encountering a bear. They will definitely fuck you up but it’s not like they are starting their day to be like “Imma go murder a human” in the same way other urban-adjacent animals are—I think they just wanna get that sweet sweet pick-a-nic basket.
dies from turkey assault
You mean there are single cougars in you local area ? I always thought these ads were lying
Maybe the targeted advertising got your location wrong?
There are enough of them that I no longer go in certain areas of the forest unless I’m armed. And I always have 2 arms on me at all times.
This is what a bear would say to lull us into a false sense of security.
woah woah, bear with me here…
Polar bears will absolutely try to hunt you. They’ll eat anything that moves. The only way to deal with a polar bear is a gun.
The ancient drawing was by a caveman trying to convince his caveman bros that he could totally take a polar bear.
Tbh, even if you have a gun, your odds are not 100%. You’re firing at essentially a biological tank, small caliber fire might cause pain and eventually kill a polar bear with non-vital shots, but it’s not going to stop one barreling down on you.
Realistically, you need to be a decent enough marksmen to aim for a vital point, all while making your will saves because a giant monster is charging you. I’m pretty sure most humans are still fucked.
Moose are not to be trifled with either. If you accidentally put yourself between mama and baby, you’re gonna have a real bad time
And the cocaine. Some of them also want that sweet cocaine.
Eeeep!
Why’s the black bear so sad?
the grizzly is telling him “Ah, Jesus. I wish you could see this. Light’s coming up. I’ve never seen a painting that captures the beauty of the ocean at a moment like this. I’m gonna make you rich, Bud Fox. Yeah. Rich enough, you can afford a girl like Darien. This is your wake-up call, pal. Go to work.”
It’s forced to play the humiliating role of smallest by comparison.
oh anf the human is just a little snack?I just realised its a photo not a drawing
*first floor windows don’t go nuts guys no way that lad is reaching all the way to the second floor
Is the US the first floor is the ground floor, second floor is what is called the 1st floor in many other countries
Or “Zeroth Floor”.
Just like we have a zeroth century, aye guys?
Calling something a “second storey” just sounds weird, although at least because they spelt it “story” we know they mean in the US sense.
Where’s that “imma fight a gorilla” guy when you need him?
Snapping out of your fantasy as you’re being eaten alive is a bad move.
I feel like the other option is a Jacob’s Ladder experience
Yikes.
For the uninitiated, that’s like having your life flash before your eyes but all you remember is every vivid detail from Evangelion.
Or an isekai
Fun fact: Grizzlies and Polar Bears are the same species according to the Biological Species Concept.
Meaning they interbreed in the wild (somewhat rare), and produce viable offspring that can have babies as well.
We’re actually noticing this happening more and more with climate change. As Grizzly populations move further and further north, they’re encountering polar bears more often and are more likely to mate.
Hey, Mac! You still have that Halloween costume?
In the near future, Polar Bears as a separate species will likely disappear, and we’ll have all hybrids.
So are Neanderthals and homo sapiens the same species then?
Close enough that we probably helped bred them out of existence. Neanderthal genetic markers show up with some regularity in certain modern human populations.
Edit to add: While humans didn’t breed them out of existence, we certainly did intermix with them. And that does help to maintain their existence yet today.
Scary… Polar bears comming to my house! Slightly larger whiter Grizzlys still a problem.
The number of confirmed hybrids has since risen to eight, all of them descending from the same female polar bear
She has a type.
She likes them brown boys
fun fact: polar bears have black skin.
There are tons and tons and tons of species that can do this. It’s not clear to me what the prevailing species concept is nowadays, if we’re even still following one.
Fun fact: Grizzlies and Polar Bears are the same species according to the Biological Species Concept.
Calling it that gives it too much credit, it is something thought up in the 17th/18th century without any concept of genetics and evolution.
Which might explain why it breaks down almost instantly under any amount of scrutiny.
It’s a category. All lines are arbitrary to a degree and “interbreeds and produces viable offspring” is not exceedingly arbitrary. You can have arguments around populations which could and would interbreed if they weren’t geographically distinct, you can argue about whether offspring needs to be viable no matter which way around the sexes of the parents are, or how large the percentage of viable offspring needs to be, but in the end, yep it makes sense to have a distinction somewhere around that bunch of criteria.
House cats and European wild cats are considered distinct species not because they’re genetically incompatible, but because they don’t interbreed to any significant degree – too many behavioural differences, and we’re not speaking about culture, here. So even if they could intermingle in theory in practice they don’t, so they stay separate, so they’re different species.
It’s kind of… a behavioural view on the genome? If you have a better idea, field it, there has to be some dividing line because taxa for the taxonomy god.
Biologists wouldn’t say they’re the same species, because biologists are aware of interspecies hybrids and the species problem.
Tall snow doggos
They may kill SEAL with a slap but how many polar bear slaps does it take to kill members of other special forces?
I don’t know…Ask Mr. Owl.
One
That depends on the bear’s tactical training, if the bear went through bootcamp then it’s one slap, if the bear is also a SEAL then it’s half a slap.
I bet they gives good hugs :3
Only once
It will keep you warm and cozy for the rest of your life!
Great source of vitamin A!
enough to become toxic to humans.
Also vitamin AA, AAA, and AAAA.
Duracel picked a wrong mascot.
Here is a black bear, a grizzly, and a polar bear.
And Marcie.
Meaning they’re vastly overpowered for their current environment. That power cones at the cost of needing more calories. Why did they evolve that way? What did they hunt earlier, Mammoths?
In that kind of cold, body mass matters for keeping warm. You need to be bigger to survive and they aren’t really over powered for their environment.
The bear in the mural does not look tall enough to look in a second story window. Is that a young one?
