Im male born, but i dont feel particularly “male” so to speak: currently im non-binary bc i dont feel i belong to gender categories. Its just like im mentally in a gender-limbo and i think ive been in it my whole life, but its not concrete, as in sometimes i wish i was a girl (this happened also when i was a kid) but at the same time i feel like the categories of binary gender arent fit for me. Im just confused as in what i am. From the outside i think im generally seen as male but inside it’s kinda like i don’t care but i don’t like to be in the gender binary but i wish i was more “girly”. Can anyone relate?
This gives so much perspective, and feels like not being alone, thank you.
Sometimes I struggle with my own, internalized expectations of masculinity and that the world expects a 6’8" guy who also has 0 external feminine traits to behave “like a man” doesn’t make it easier.
I’m so incredibly fortunate to have found a strong woman who will hold me when I cry and loves me for my sensitivity and empathy.
None of this means I’m gender fluid, I’m… okay, relaxed, not unhappy with my masculinity, sometimes I can even revel in it. But modern sentiments that deconstruct social expectations of gender roles have made it sooooo much easier to just exist, even as a cis man for all the times that I strongly deviate from them. It’s only that societal expectations have been internalized hard by my generation and it can still be such a struggle.
Comments like yours make it easier, because I know I’m not alone in this. Thank you.