[Engagement from anyone welcome]
Context, informed consent is a thing here and I will likely be starting HRT in the next month or two. Here is what my thought process has been for the last year since beginning to socially transition, although very slowly.
- I should buy feminine clothes
- I don’t want to have to buy new clothes once my measurements (hopefully) change from HRT
- I will wait to buy feminine clothes
- I should practice makeup
- Makeup makes dysphoria worse
- I should start HRT / look into FFS
- I will wait to practice makeup
- I should start HRT
- I haven’t earned that; I don’t dress or present fem
- Kick can down the road for HRT
The good news is I called a doctor last week to schedule the appointment! So things are progressing. Just wanted to see if any guys, gals, or pals have had a similar experience with their transition, or seen someone else go through that.
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I haven’t earned that
Stop right there. You have a medical condition that needs treatment. No one earns medical care, it’s a necessity.
I agree with everything the other commenter said, thrift your clothes, and start with simple makeup. It will help you familiarize with women’s clothing sizes (they are nebulous), and what styles you enjoy. The more time you have practicing eyeliner, eye shadow blending, and blush placement, the better it will look when you’re ready to wear it in public and the more confident you will feel. I used to just sit with YouTube makeup tutorials and practice with them until I found things I liked
I’m not OP, but are there any particular YouTube channels you recommend for beginner makeup tutorials?
You have a medical condition that needs treatment. No one earns medical care, it’s a necessity.
this a thousand times, shout it from the rooftops: transition is not earned, is not a luxury, is not optional - it is a medical necessity
I bought femme clothes from thrift stores. It’s cheap, I could swap out equivalent masc clothes that I didn’t anticipate needing. It got easier over time as a sense of style developed. I’m 3.5 months HRT and 90% of my clothing was purchased pre-HRT, no significant size changes yet. Exception: Bras were mainly purchased after.
For makeup, even in boy mode a little foundation and blush made me feel cuter. The key with makeup is subtlety. And a lot of foundation to hide shadow, if that’s a concern.
Finally, a skin care routine did wonders for me, especially once HRT began. I use CeraVe cleanser, moisturizer, and a Neutrogena retinol cream between them every other day at night, plus a Neutrogena sunscreen in the morning. It had super noticeable softening effects on my face within two weeks.
What helps me is: you can experiment with all this stuff without necessarily taking it out of your bedroom if you don’t want to. You can wash off the makeup. Or you might feel great and go out.
Good luck!
I wouldn’t delay on HRT, I think it should be the first thing people do.
I will add to the other excellent comments here: there are no perfect times. Waiting for everything to align just so will prevent everything from ever happening. Pick a goal and start it. Now. It seems like you took the first step, so congratulations! I’m not bitter about it, but I am an example of what happens when you wait for perfect alignment. You may wake up one day and say “why did I let the last decade go by in a fog instead of taking action” and regret missing some of your best years living as the real you. Don’t wait for any conditions, just improve the ones you have as you go.
