Please help me, Lemmy.
I was staying at a friend’s for a month waiting for an affordable room to be available, only to move in and after a week see a bedbug.
It’s a single room, for poor people, with a shared kitchen.
I am poor, work remotely, and my financial situation is bad. I thought this could improve things.
I moved in a week ago, but didn’t move all my stuff in because it’s in boxes in my friend’s garage right now.
I have moved in with 2 outfits, 2 jackets, a work computer, some computer accessories, and have purchased 1 matress and pillow and bed sheet set at target.
The manager of the property beforehand said there haven’t been bed bugs for years, but one of the door has like a block over the bottom with powder in the doorway past the block to kill bugs as like a sort of trap. The manager said prior to my moving in this is just fear from 3 years ago. The units are very affordable and I had to be on a waitlist to get a unit.
I am not sure what to do. The place is mostly quiet and I could work here. I don’t love the area because although it’s low income rent, it’s in a high cost area with many food places nearby charging very high tourist amounts, like any burrito or sandwich is $13 at least. Rent is very low, however.
I could leave now before moving other stuff in, put my stuff in bags except for my work computer when getting back to my friends, and look for a different slightly more expensive place. I can’t stay with my friend long-term because her apartment is next to a distribution center with trucks pulling in and out all night and I wake up easily due to PTSD and always being on alert, even when sleeping. She sleeps through anything. I also don’t like ear-plugs and can’t sleep with them in. When I was staying there I was chronically tired.
Suggestions from Lemmy? How bad are bed bugs? It was only 1 but I squished it. Pest control coincidentally came that day and identified it is a bed bug.
Also, I have not paid rent for this month and it’s due by tomorrow. I could actually leave immediately, today even, and just not pay the rent. My credit is bad already and the money would be useful if it’s a mistake to stay. It’s sleazy to leave wirhout paying for this month, but I am poor and may not have the luxury of paying for a place that could result in a chronic bed bug infestation. I would also lose my deposit.
I also don’t know where it came from. I can’t be totally sure it didn’t come from my friend’s place although I stayed there 5 weeks and saw nothing bad. I also had purchased a new outfit from a store with vintage recycled clothes, like an upscale GoodWill store, but that was 2 weeks ago and there were no bites. It may not be from the new place, but I don’t think I was bitten before the move in. Strangely, I don’t even know if the bedbug I squished bit me. The pest control person said the city has many infestations and could have come from public transportation.
My friend lives 6 hours away by bus and I don’t know as many people there. It’s also a cheaper area and I could move there. I could actually just get a ticket and leave today if everything else is irrational.
I am very tired and don’t know what to think. The time at my friends impacted my mental health and I’m not sure I am seeing it rationally.
For this post only, please upvote for stay in bed bug place for another month, down vote for leave in next 24 hours if you want.
The problem is, if there’s bed bugs and you go somewhere else, it’s very likely they’ll attach to your belonging and hitch a hike to your new place… Best would be have the landlord take care of the issue, it is their responsibility after all.
If the landlord doesn’t cooperate, maybe you can tell them you’ll call pest control yourself and deduct the amount from the rent you owe… no idea how well that would go legally speaking, but maybe it’ll allow you some negotiating leverage. (obligatory IANAL)
If the landlord doesn’t cooperate, maybe you can tell them you’ll call pest control yourself and deduct the amount from the rent you owe… no idea how well that would go legally speaking, but maybe it’ll allow you some negotiating leverage. (obligatory IANAL)
Not usually kosher. Withholding rent isn’t typically. Many places have a Landlord/Tenant regulatory body. And in a situation like this, you would usually say to your landlord something along the lines of:
It’s your responsibility as the landlord to deal with pests. Since you continue to refuse, I’m forced to go through XYZ Regulatory Board.
Start whatever system that regulator has to deal with landlords not keeping on top of their obligations. If paying for and withholding rent is what’s allowed, it’s better that you have contacted the organisation responsible for enforcement of rental laws. If just withholding rent is what’s allowed, said organisation will often be a “neutral” 3rd party and hold the money due to the landlord in escrow until they do whatever they are supposed to.
Just withholding rent is grounds for eviction almost everywhere. Do not withhold rent as the first step.
If you withhold rent without going through the proper systems you will often get a “you were right, but you didn’t do it right, so you still have to get out” from the regulator when they enforce what is actually a legal eviction.
I believe you need to gas the place three times to fully eradicate them.
In a reply to OP I mentioned having grown up in an area that was essentially a bedbug hotspot. Gassed 3 times if you’re lucky.
If you’re willing to just cut everything and GTFO, can stick a few sets of clothes in a bag and into the freezer for preferably 48hrs+, shoes too. While you wait, contact the city, inform them you are in an infested house. Bag everything up and most cities have a dedicated disposal team.
When you’ve sorted all the stuff and put it where disposal can get it take your sealed bag of freezer clothes directly out of the house to somewhere with no carpet, vinyl flooring or concrete, and no furniture nearby. Place the freezer bag away from all walls, stand well away from it and strip everything. All of what you take of goes into a different bag to be disposed of. If you have someone you’re comfortable being naked around do this with a buddy, check eachother for bedbugs, get dressed. Bring the infested bag to the disposal pile. That bag. Does. Not. Touch. Your. Clothes. Sleeves rolled up, bag at arms length. Get it on the pile but don’t get close.
Bounce. Spend the next 6 months being paranoid. Or years.
If there’s something sentimental you can double or triple bag it and wait a couple years.
If it’s freezable, put it in. Even a “vacuum pack” bag unless it’s sealed perfectly, like both ends are heat sealed, can let the fuckers out. Freeze anything you want to keep for as long as possible. Minimum 48 hrs. Everything else gets gassed repeatedly, or disposed of. Kill it with fire if you can do so without being arrested or accidentally killing someone.
If I stay, I won’t withhold rent. I am only withholding rent if I am leaving, and then I can say I left because it’s not habitable. These places are cheap and the legal costs of filing suit against me would not be worth recovery. They would keep my deposit and then I’d move on. It may be the rational thing to do, to just leave immediately.
Get that. Could still be held liable for back rent. Just don’t want you to get fucked over because your landlord is a slumlord. Do what you need to do. But don’t fuck over tomorrow you while doing it.
Sorry you’re going through this. Such a nightmare. Unironically sending you good outcome vibes.
Something to consider is a mattress protector that kills bed bugs and seals the mattress from other ones getting in. I don’t want to promote them here but I know a company that sells them, but they’re not super cheap ($75 to $150). Good side is that it has a 10 year warranty. DM me if you want details.
The problem is, if there’s bed bugs and you go somewhere else, it’s very likely they’ll attach to your belonging and hitch a hike to your new place…
Except barely anything is here. I have some cheap clothes I could throw out, and air mattress and sheets and a pillow I can throw out. The only things I need is the work computer and electronics (can be bagged and frozen) and would need to use the work computer quickly. Is it worth it? I’ve heard getting rid of bed bugs is hell. Should I just cut my losses?
I speak from experience with them. You will bring them everywhere. They hide in everything they can. I went through two months of dealing with them and they are hell.
If someone came over knowing they had a bed bug problem and brought them into to my apartment, I’d make sure it came out of their pocket to fix it.
They can take weeks and multiple exterminator visits to fully get rid of them. Make the landlord fix it or find another place (and take precautions not to bring them to your next place!)
But I was only here a week so far. I could take the bus, buy new clothes at Walmart and change inside a restroom before going, just throwing out my current clothes. I have so little I would be taking with me and could put the electronics in garbage bags and freeze them. The only concern is the work computer, but I could use a sick day for work and freeze that for a day.
I’ve barely been here at all. There are also many people living in this building with some shared facilities.
Should I just leave today? I could do that, it’s not impossible, a bus leaves in a few hours.
They’re right. A week is 6 days, 23 hours, and 45 minutes longer than it takes to get yourself and any luggage or boxes, bags, purses, shoes with a strap that’s fabric on fabric. If it’s a proper bedbug infestation, sitting on anything. Putting your shoes next to the wall or in a closet on the floor. Putting a bag on the floor. They’re small, easily visible when you know where to look, but if you’re not specifically looking for them, and you go into an infested home/hotel/restaurant/shop, now you almost certainly have them on you and/or your stuff. They’ll hang out until you put whatever they’re on down, or sometimes just fall off. And now wherever they jump ship gets infested too.
Edit: Sorry, Trauma response. Metro area I grew up in had/has a bedbug epidemic. Multiple times living in infested apartments, or going to a friend’s I haven’t seen in awhile then getting a call a few days later saying they found a bunch of bedbugs and having to purge everything. shudders
But I have so little stuff here. I can actually purge everything except the work computer, and I can keep that frozen for half a day without it breaking.
The stuff here isn’t that valuable.
work computer
So. Not to freak you out. But they totally hang out inside electronics.
I would contact your work’s IT, if it’s your employer’s, and ask them if they have a protocol for bedbugs. If the landlord is willing to fumigate, the computer can be damaged by the chemicals used. So you still need to get in touch with IT.
Bed bugs are good at hiding. If there’s one, either it hitched a ride with you or someone else, or there’s more hiding nearby. Look all around the mattress, sofas, etc. maybe ask the pest control guy for a thorough inspection.
As far as leaving… well, depends on your rental contract whether you’re (legally) allowed to leave at a moment’s notice. Also, once again, you’d still have to take a lot of care inspecting and/or sanitizing your belonging, or getting rid of them.
On the positive side, bed bugs are annoying but they don’t transmit diseases like e.g. mosquitos or ticks.
Source:
I’m not allowed to look into other rooms of other tenants. I get the sense that because the rooms are small, many may be cluttered.
I am not that concerned whether I am legally allowed to leave. I don’t have much, they won’t bother suing me and my credit is bad. The laws of physics allow me to walk out, go purchase a bus pass, and leave with 2 bags of stuff and be on my way.
What worries me is moving my stuff in, bed bugs get into everything, and then I become one of those people fighting bed bugs for years. It sounds awful. I am poor but work full time, I don’t want to be afflicted by constant bed bugs. I want to know the optimal choice to reduce my own suffering given asymmetric information. It’s possible just walking away is the best choice, but my finances are not good right now.
In my experience with bedbugs, the way I found out I had them was my sleep schedule reversed. I just found myself up all night and only sleeping during the day.
Only later did I discover it was due to bed bugs. My subconscious responded to them before I became aware of them consciously.
The reason I say this is that you mentioned your being a light sleeper with PTSD.
Bed bugs will affect your sleep. You need to take this into consideration when planning your life.
My advice leans toward saying fuck that place and finding a new one, and the reason isn’t the bedbugs but rather your landlord’s dishonesty.
Your landlord is either lying to you (concerning) or to himself (double concerning). The fact your landlord has taken anti-bedbug measures and yet claims there are no bed bugs is a major red flag.
Bed bugs are hard enough to deal with when everyone is on board and communicating, and not in denial about their existence. One of the hardest aspects of bed bugs is they’re easy to be in denial about. If anyone is showing signs of denial, that is in turn a sign that this might be an unwinnable bed bug fight.
It takes a lot of coordinated, disciplined action among a group of people to eradicate a bedbug infestation. If someone in the group is lying, that’s a very bad indication for the group’s ability to succeed.
My advice would be to confront the landlord about exactly what the fuck is going on with the bedbugs, what the history is, etc. Then, based on how authentic and trustable your landlord presents in that conversation, decide based on that.
There’s a manager and the stuff goes to the manager and that goes to the landlord.
I agree with what you are saying about communication and if there’s not clear communication it will never get better.
But also, I’m not sure writing them will help because they will either be dishonest or honest and I won’t be able to tell based on the email. I also put this to a vote in a post near the end (up for stay, down for leave immediately) and as of now it’s no upvotes and all 9 were leave immediately.
I’m not really able to think that well due to various mental health issues impacting executive dysfunction. I still have things I want, and can still sort of function within society, and so I still exist as a human of sorts, but something like this is super hard for me because of what essentially amounts to brain damage caused by extreme trauma and then drug use prior to a suicide attempt a long time ago, and I had expected drugs to make the attempt easier. (Spoiler alert: the attempt failed.)
So… I’m probably just going to go with the majority of Lemmy down voting this and just leave.
It sucks, my friend’s place has major problems. I may think about it more and change my mind.
Perhaps I’ll be bitten tonight leaving me with less asymmetric information?
Have you tried a white noise generator for your sleeping issues? There are several early available, I happen to use TMSoft’s White Noise. It has a lot of options for sound. I use a mix of pink noise for overall masking, heavy rain to make the pink noise more palatable than a plain hum, and an extreme thunderstorm - adding the extra thunder helps me sleep through bass sounds like vacuum cleaners and garbage trucks.
It’s extremely loud noise, sometimes beeping, backing up noises, etc.
Between getting less sleep, or getting less sleep with a side of PTSD, you’re better off picking the former.
If they’re infesting the place and can’t be dealt with in a single attempt, you’re not just going to be dealing with the bloodsucking pests. It would be dealing with the constant anxiety and stress of whether and when they’re going to come back, and all the disruptions and extra work caused in the course of trying to kill them. And that’s in addition to whatever annoyance and discomfort they cause while feeding on you.
They have options to add in like birdsong and wind chimes to your personalized mix. The idea isn’t necessarily to drown out the noise you’re hearing, it’s too make the noise more acceptable.
Like loud diesel trucks drive me nuts. But I toss on a thunderstorm, maybe a bit of purring cat, and I can ignore them.
If you can, move. Wash all your belongings and directly put them in plastic bags.
I have had bedbugs (bought at second hand bed, yay) and while you probably won’t wake up from being eaten on, my partner gets intense stress from just the thought of having bedbugs again. The knowledge that these little fuckers live in your bed and will come out to eat you at night is really unpleasant.
If you have to stay at the place, be prepared that you will be eaten on until they are gone depending on the treatment.
If the infestation isn’t huge pest control will probably just sprinkle some silica powder around where they live (this is like glass making them cut themselves to bits when they walk out to feed) which means you will have to sleep in the bed and let them feed on you. If they don’t detect a body they just stay put, and they can stay put for a year and a half. If you sleep on a couch they will just walk over there instead, spreading the infestation.Also they breed like hell so get pest control on that asap
Edit: oh and for god’s sake do not bring more stuff there until it’s gone.
Immediately request Landlord action and if they refuse file a complaint with the closest rental authority: either the city or the county should have one.
You can deter bedbugs with mint essential oils, it messes with their pheromone receptors, and you can kill them with freezing. Do all of your laundry with soap thoroughly to avoid them and their eggs.
If I can kill them by freezing, I have only 2 bags of stuff here. I can leave with two bags, buy garbage bags and 2 more bags, put the first bags in the garbage bags and the garbage bags in the second bags, and buy new clothes and shoes and socks and just have everything sealed tight. I would be able to freeze what I have, that’s easy. I came in with 2 medium bags, almost nothing, and I can just consider the mattress and sheets and pillow a loss since they are too risky to save (and were really cheap anyway).
I had these once. It was psychologically terrible. If you already struggle with sleep or mental health, you’re going to have a very bad time living there while you treat the place.
I saw some good advice in the comments as far as diatomaceous earth and freezing. Make sure you look up the actual temps things will need to get to. I recall baking my clothing in my oven at 110 F, or something like that, before leaving the apartment every day so I wouldn’t spread them. Ugh.
I ended up throwing out most of my stuff, bagging up anything I wanted to keep but didn’t need to access for ~6 months (or whatever their lifespan is) into tightly tied garbage bags with diatomaceous earth inside, and for the remaining possessions, I heated them or sprayed the shit out of their cracks (like wood furniture) with bedbug spray.
Just assume your stuff is infested and treat anything that was in there with you. Don’t fuck around. Go full nuclear on your shit after you move out. It’s the only way you’ll be able to sleep soundly for years.
Best of luck to you. I really hope your living situation gets better. I think I saw your fallback option was loud. I sleep with an earbud in whichever ear isn’t smooshed into my pillow. I also recommend those white noise machines that have an actual fan inside (or just a loud-ass fan lol). Even if it doesn’t drown out all the noise, it’ll cut out a lot and it’ll be easier for your brain to tune out stuff. Maybe that’s something you can try.
No chance he’ll ever get rid of them if he stays, the other people may not treat their portion and they’ll be back.
There are also free apps and YouTube videos of sleep noise if you’ve got a speaker or earbuds to help drown it out. Can download the audio with youtubetomp3 searching and not use bandwidth repeatedly each time.
Bed bugs are BAD. Where was the bug when you found it? Was it on you, the floor, your stuff? Was it alive or dead? Could you stay there a few more days without bringing the rest of your stuff from your friend’s place and see if more bugs appear?
Bed bugs spread quickly and can travel on you or your clothes and infest other locations. That being said, it may have just been one. Then again, if it came from the apartment next door, more will likely infiltrate your place. If they are coming from next door, it won’t be enough to spray just your apartment, the entire building will need it.
Sorry for the difficult situation you’re in, this is a tough call.
the bed bug was on my air mattress, on top of a target fitted sheet, below a larger target sheet used as a blanket. I saw it and squished it and blood came out. I don’t remember if it moved but seemed alive.
I could stay a few more days to see how it goes without bring more stuff in. But I would then need to pay this month’s rent or incur late fees and violate lease terms.
My stuff is all in a closet on shelves. The air mattress is on the ground. It could have come from another apartment. It may be that other residents know, but don’t want fumigation, hence the strange bug traps in front of a door and the white anti-bed-bug stuff sprinkled in front of another door. It could be the bugs come from the street, I slept with a windows open.
My room is almost empty so far.
Are you sure it’s a bedbug? Can you find a way to elevate your bed off the floor. They sell bed bug traps that are little cups that sit under your bed feet. You can try diatomaceous earth. Keep pushing for the landlord or the other roommates to get it treated.
Yes, I am sure and the exterminator person who stops by monthly confirmed it’s a real bed buf. I can elevate the bed if needed, but it may not be worth it, I could also just leave today.
It may be that other residents know, but don’t want fumigation
They likely know and would prefer the landlord do anything possible. When someone brought them to my old building they did heat treatments, no fumigation.
Fuck, I’m getting chills just thinking about it. The treatments worked and I haven’t lived there in years.
That’s a really tough situation. I assume you’ve told your friend that you were staying with? Because tbh if it were me I’d make you strip down outside and put your clothes in a plastic bag before entering.
Also, hardly a consolation, but they seem to prefer some blood more than others. I was lucky to not be bitten much but my roommate was not. You may be lucky. But don’t discount the mental toll. I think I may have a kind of PTSD from that experience.
My friend knows. I was thinking of getting a gym membership first to shower at before entering. Even traveling on the bus seems unethical, even with new fresh clothes before traveling. I’m just screwed no matter what.
If you went in the building they are on your stuff. Speaking from experience. I had to get heat fans and have my apartment covered in sprays and powders with the heat to get rid of them. It was so terrible it took months. If you go anywhere at this point they will just follow you.
I could throw out literally everything except the electronics and freeze those. None of my clothing is nice. I need new shoes. I can’t believe it’s actually impossible.
If this really is definitely this bad, I should leave prior to paying for another month, right?
Its not impossible. But let me tell you it is a load of stress and not fun at all. I covered everything, and eventually they just crawled to the walls where I hadn’t sprayed or put powder. Absolutely horryfing and sometimes I still feel crawling on my skin.
It depends on your situation. I didnt abandon my apartment, and we actually got them all out after a month or so. But I couldn’t go anywhere else. If you need this place, I’d get an exterminator. If you can kick it somewhere else and torch your stuff, I’d do that over staying. Since you said your finances are bad, both options are equally terrible for you. I’d math out whatever is cheapest for you and do that.
The problem with the exterminator is there are many people living here with locked doors. Doing this in just my room is pointless if this is coming from another room.
The cheapest option is leave, stay with my friend, try to get my own place despite terrible credit, but I was sort of losing it and tired from lack of sleep there. How my friend sleeps through trucks backing up and unloading stuff next door is beyond my understanding.
Buy a bag of diatomaceous earth and a puffer and mask. Hit every seam in the baseboard and corners and every spot where your bed comes in contact with any other surface. They will die. Other treatments don’t work
