I’m talking about like, service workers and store employees who are miserable and take their anger out on completely innocent people.

If you’re hot and dress nice would it make it less likely for you to be the target of those pieces of shit?

  • Djfok43@lemmy.worldOP
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    0
    ·
    2 months ago

    Thanks for looking at my post history. I’m sure if I told him I won’t move, I would be labelled as aggressive, uncooperative and problem creating.

    You can never win.

    “You seem so disdainful” yeah maybe it’s because I’m nice to people every day and all I do is get treated like fucking garbage and this is my only outlet

    Still don’t appreciate you trying to insinuate it’s my fault

    • protist@mander.xyz
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      edit-2
      2 months ago

      I don’t know if I was insinuating that your experience here is your fault as much as I was giving explicit reasons why it’s probably your fault.

      I’m sure if I told him I won’t move, I would be labelled as aggressive, uncooperative and problem creating.

      Labelled by who? The stranger who wants your table? And then what? And why do you care? This is all you, trying to people please and avoid conflict. Assertiveness is a skill you can learn and would go a long way toward helping you with the problem you’re describing.

      • Djfok43@lemmy.worldOP
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        edit-2
        2 months ago

        You’re being unnecessarily antagonistic

        Edit: i see you have edited the comment

        • protist@mander.xyz
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          2 months ago

          I added “And why do you care?”, but you didn’t respond to anything I said anyway, so why does it matter

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      2 months ago

      If you define winning as everybody always liking you and nobody ever having a bad opinion of you then yes, you can never win.

      The trick is not to define “winning” as some impossible task like everyone always liking you.

    • can@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      2 months ago

      because I’m nice to people every day and all I do is get treated like fucking garbage and this is my only outlet

      There’s a difference between being nice and letting people walk all over you.

      • Djfok43@lemmy.worldOP
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        2 months ago

        I mean to say, I always begin each interaction with being nice. I don’t come to them with a crap mood or aggression

        • intensely_human@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          0
          ·
          2 months ago

          Ethics is more complicated than you think it is.

          There is absolutely no reason that the set of rules you learned first would be the actual set of rules that governs people.

          As you have learned, being non-aggressive is not sufficient strategy to avoid others’ aggression.

          There’s no reason to think it would be, except that it was in kindergarten when large authority giants would easily overpower any aggressor, and would by policy do so on behalf of the nonagressive ones.

          Don’t confuse kindergarten rules for global culture. Huge mistake.

          Actual culture evolved from nature, and in nature in order to protect yourself you must retaliate when attacked. Every organism has weapons. Every organism.

          Meditate on that. Why would every organism use some of its previous energy budget building weapons? Why would evolution select for that 100% of the time?