Drank breast milk straight from the source as an adult. I highly recommend it if you get the opportunity though.

I have been ‘interviewed’ by the Secret Service 2x in my life.

Both times because I was a young dumbass, and both times I am sure they wrote in my official file: ‘harmless dumbass’.

Broken neck and back. Don’t recommend.
★☆☆☆☆

In November 1988, I traveled to Yugoslavia and met the Medjugorje visionaries who claim that Mary, the mother of Jesus, appears to them.

Updates: Yugoslavia no longer exists. I am now an atheist.

I used to believe there were a ton of things that the universe decided to fuck me in particular. Turns out, it was autisim.

I attended a 1-on-1 meeting that a billionaire scheduled with me but that they themselves did not attend.

I have flown from the Garden State to the Sunshine State in two different countries.

Hmmm, for something that very few other people on lemmy have?

For the general world?

I tried to talk someone out of suicide and failed. Can’t think of something less cool or envy-inducing.

Killed myself successfully and lived to tell the tale

Not all at the same time:

• Broken both ankles at once
• Bitten by a snake, twice (two different snakes)
• In (temporary) remission from myeloma, an incurable blood cancer

This is a lame burn, and a crappy post. If you don’t like the movie why not just say that instead of a half-assed attempt to be witty? What didn’t you like about it?

Waaaaay back in college (this was over a decade ago), I wrote a 16-page paper making the argument that there were only four continents, not five, six, or seven as various countries proclaim:

The Cliff Notes:

• North America and South America can be still considered a single continent due to the fact that the Panama Canal doesn’t fully bisect the two landmasses. (The Isthmus of Panama is still very much wild rainforest and lakes, and the canal is essentially two points on each side connected by a boat route across multiple of these lakes).

So, #1: America (alt. the Americas)

• Europe and Asia are not actually bisected into two landmasses, and if anything any physical connection is reinforced by the fact that the boundary is the Ural Mountain range.

So, #2: Eurasia

• Prior to the construction of the Suez Canal in 1869, Europe and Africa were indeed the same landmass, connected by the Isthmus of Suez. However, as the Suez Canal is a sea-level canal, it is created by literally cutting the landmasses apart down to relative sea levels.

So, #3: Africa

• Australia…Yeah, I didn’t see any reason why it should lose its status as the world’s biggest island and smallest continent.

So, #4: Australia

• Antarctica I didn’t consider a continent because it’s mostly ice, and if Australia is considered the minimum bound for how big a “continent” should be, then, well, the portion of Antarctica that is actually ground below all that ice is actually a smaller contiguous size than Australia, ergo it cannot count as a continent.

'Course now I’m older and realize that was all bullshit. Lol. Sure it makes sense from a geological standpoint (but even that is bullshit as geologically there are no “continents”, only plates), but a continent is more than its geological structure; it’s geological, political, and economic, all three of these rolled into one.

Sources for Images Used:

1. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panama_Canal
2. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ural_Mountains
3. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suez_Canal

I’m the first of my kind to land on a payroll on my line of work in my country. I’m the reason my job recognized in the national job definitions papers.

I exemplified other companies that we’re worth permanent hiring, so I know at least 50 people got permanent jobs a few years after I did.

(We’re usually hired for gigs or projects)

I failed linear algebra twice and barely passed the third time.

Cool? Definitely not, or at least I don’t think so. And I very seriously doubt anyone would be jealous.

I used to go up in the mountains by myself. Bare minimum supplies, like a knife, the clothes on my back, and an emergency pack for “in case shit”, that if I had to touch, the trip was over. I also went armed because shit can happen.

Now, I did this for years, and it was very rare for anything bad to happen at all, and the worst stuff wasn’t life threatening except once. I’d run across bears, a few crazy people, maybe twist an ankle or some such.

But that one time.

So, there’s a feral dog problem. They’ve interbred with what’s called the eastern coyote, which itself is supposedly a mix of coyote, wolf, and a little dog.

The eastern coyote is rarely a problem. Small family groups, avoid people. If you see them at all, it’s unusual.

But when they mix with dogs, and those dogs are feral, the packs get bigger and they tend to not be scared of humans.

Well, I was cooking a fish I caught during one summer when the weather had been dry, and small animal populations were low.

The smell brought a pack in. Enough of them that they tried to circle me in and come at me after the fish I threw to them wasn’t interesting enough.

I had 14 rounds on me, and I needed most of them. The first couple of shots missed because I was fucking terrified. At that point, I’d never taken any training for shooting under pressure, so I was panic breathing and shaking hard.

You’d think the sound of a 45 going off would have scared them off, but it didn’t. I dropped a couple of them, swapped mags and dropped two more before the rest ran off. One of them, I had to finish because I didn’t get a clean shot because it was early in the half a minute it all took.

I hiked my ass back out as soon as I could stop shaking and keep my legs under me. And I did the hike with a nice wet spot because I pissed myself a little.

Went to the ranger station, reported it, did all that crap and went home.

Now, there was also a less dramatic event not maybe ten miles away where I found a body. Suicide, shotgun vs head. That was not fun either; but plenty of people have found dead bodies. Those were the two worst things I ever had happen up there on my own.