UNSUBSCRIBE
501 CONVENIENT SERVER ERROR
Thank you for confirming that you are reachable at your listed email address! We will not contact you anymore, but we have already sold this information to our corporate sponsors, have the shittiest day imaginable!:-)
Bitch.
Tap for spoiler
/s
No cap, tis fr fr
wut. is that english??
BONTO! was sooo good. Like it really improved the Slorpiness.
As a top 1% graaaaj user, I always felt bad for you guys. You should migrate to graaaaj, we have asparagus!
I prefer Slurm, myself.
You jest but…
Enshittification never sleeps, stealing all ideas that it can possibly get away with!
<unwarranted rage No way, BONTO! sucked. You couldn’t even Slorp your entire friends list anymore, and they added all of those BONTOgrams for no reason. We disagree on a topic, so I despise you now and your entire genetic line. </rage
But you should really try NeWSlarP, a FLOSS fork of Slorp by the original developer that brings back both SlorpTokens and Schlarpmänner!
deleted by creator
Closing
for the tag is left as an exercise for the reader.
unwarrantedis a property of theragetag (the properties are declared before the tag name)Closing
for the tag is left as an exercise for the reader.Lmao that’s great
This… This isn’t something you can actually do in HTML is it? I’ve been doing web development for years and I feel like I’m about to learn some horrifically cursed knowledge…
Nope, it’s a CHTML extension. C for cursed, although that’s redundant.
HTML goes <br>
HTML goes <br>
I’m not sure if that’s a “machine goes brrrrrr” joke or not. If it is, it’s brilliant. XD
oh thank fuck
The real answer is that when I closed the tags, they didn’t show up in the comment. So I left them open, because it looked utterly ridiculous. But I like your interpretation way better!
Probably needed to escape them with \
No way! BONTO! was just the enshitfication of Slorp by a private equity firm.
Slorp was so much better before they changed their name to Bonto. Only young people prefer Bonto, and they’re idiots.
Bonto killed Slorp, Bonto is the only reason it shutdown.
Are you being serious? Slorp sucked. I think that’s why they chose the name… because it sounds like sucking.
Boomer comment!
I do miss BONTO! though. Not gonna lie.
The same could be said for any form of communication, really.
I remember when phones used to be good. Now it’s all
- We have important information about your car’s warranty.
- Here’s information on new solar panel installation that doesn’t work with your home / location.
- You’ve been selected to answer a quick 15 question survey.
I remember when mail used to be good. Now it’s all
- I’m a disgraced Nigerian prince and I need your help to protect my multi-million dollar fortune.
- Here’s all the important sales WalMart is having this week! Don’t miss out!
- Here’s your electricity bill that you’re enrolled in auto-pay for. No action is needed on your part, but we’re sending you this 12-page summary anyway.
I remember when phones used to be good.
Telemarketers have been around for a long, long time (Wikipedia claim “…the practice of contacting potential customers by telephone originated in the late 19th century.”).
I personally recall a lot more telemarketing in the 90s, though I was a kid and just passed the phone to mom or dad. But that was also a time when caller ID was a luxury, and not everyone had answering machines.
The last time I had a landline was 16 years ago when my wife briefly had a home office. Her employer required the landline as part of the home office setup (they paid for it).
We got spammed by robocallers every 5-10 minutes all day long and half the night. It was so bad that my wife never knew when a work call was coming in and had to let every call go to voicemail.
We didn’t unplug the phone just turned the answering machine to silent. We still got calls on a supposedly disconnected number.
Will happen to every new medium eventually. It’s inevitable under capitalism.
I think a lot about a post I saw that said “you hate every piece of capitalism but refuse to connect the dots to see that picture”
Rss? Granted I haven’t touched it in years so idk if it’s still good
It’s still good. It’s great even. The best part is you can’t “leak” an RSS address so when you subscribe to something you won’t be added to spam without you knowing. It’s a great medium.
Join BONTO! plus today and experience our latest, AI enchanced premium features.
I never knew when email was useful. It’s all cold calls, or useless actions and full of anxiety experience. And in the middle of all that still have to be careful with spam and phishing. Some people say that is useful for quick messages, but then if in a thread with people during one day or two all the freaking messages are like “Hi Mark,… Best Regards” bullshit, forcing me to go to the search engine trying to find a closing statement different than previous…
Really, email, my only wish is for it to die. And everyone just expects you to know how to use it, with those useless and weird Bcc and Cc and other weird magical keywords. Don’t get me started on “email etiquette” when everybody does it different and if you fo to some mailing lists you are immediately bullied or dismissed just because you don’t know the magical incantations they work with…
It’s all bullshit and I deeply hate it in my soul. Truly a tech from the 60s.
Skill issue
PEBKAC.
ID10T error
they hated him for speaking the truth
Zombo’s never left me 🫂
It’s still there!
Well, Zombo is FOSS!
Come to ZOMBO DOT COM
Not a fan of BONTO!’s forced arbitration clause though.
My email is pretty clean. I still have my AOL email that was my AIM account in like middle / high school. I give that out to any companies that want an email address, while my Gmail account stays nice and neat. The only thing is my wife will occasionally buy stuff in my name and give out my sacred Gmail account. I damn near filed divorce papers.
You missed the one about the data breach that they are still investigating, but subtly hint that your full contact details, credit card, social security number, health status, sexual orientation, bank account, and passwords were sold on the dark web.
Then 3 years later
Brooks, Herman and Anderson Law firm - Bonto data privacy class action lawsuit
bonto has settled and agreed to provide one year of credit monitoring
Get your .0012¢ for a $7 processing fee!
That hasn’t been my experience. My portion of the settlement is usually about $100.00. it’s insulting, but it still spends.
I’m still waiting for my $13 from fuckerberg
Specifically make sure that the “subscribe to newsletter and offers” is NOT checked.
Get a marketing email from them within 24 hours anyway.
I’ve seen quite a few sites that require you to tick the box to not receive marketing, maybe it’s that
They just blatantly ignore your preferences because they know there will be no consequences.
The one thing that generally works well in Canada at least is that they must provide a way to unsubscribe at the bottom of the email. The complaint process is relatively simple and the fines for violations are steep.
Wish.com used to lock your account if you unsubscribed from their daily spam emails.
I once considered buying a product. Got as far as putting my contact and address in (no account).
I’ve changed my mind last minute, and they’ve been badgering me every since, clearly having recorded my details for marketing purposes before I ever pressed a single button.This is in the EU too, I should rat on their ass
Nicely worded. Summarize my inbox.
That why you should use multiple email accounts. One address for friends n family, one for spam that includes all confirmations etc., one for work stuff, one for bills and utilities that you must not miss, etc. It’s takes a little bit of effort to keep track of the multiple inboxes but it’s better than having all your emails go to the same place
