Be me
I’ve started sitting down to pee because it’s cleaner.
Stand up after I’ve finished peeing.
Pull up pants.
Turn around to flush.
There is poop in the toilet.
I forgot that this time I had sat down to poop.
The downside of sitting down is having to stretch to get your balls under those noisy damned dryers after… I need to get a little life preserver for the guys so they don’t get hypothermia while I’m busy.
Been there done that. Nowadays I always wipe if I don’t quite remember if I pooped or not
Normally I do even if I know I didn’t poop.
But for some inexplicable reason that day I decided to skip a step
Some people clean their ass standing up. Some people clean their ass sitting down. And both groups don’t know the other exists.
Hilarious question to ask at dinner parties with the right kind of crowd. It’s incredible watching people find out that their spouse stands.
Also, standers: represent!
And some apparently don’t clean their ass at all
and then there’s the filthy-rich who may have a designated ‘butt washer’ on the payroll.
You spelled butt licker wrong.
So that’s where that kink comes from…
I sit down when I pee
There’s nothing that crazy about me
I’m just takin a whiz
Mind your own biz
Why’s everybody always staring at me?Good advice, I’m always standing at the urinal when I forget and shit myself 💩